My Darkest & Challenging Days in India

Everyone has their dark days. Here are the toughest situations I went through — the ones that shaped my life and taught me to face any challenge that comes my way.

The Fall

Second Class Graduate — I graduated second class in Engineering, and no employer would even consider me for an interview. Though I had been programming since my 2nd year, they judged my marks alone, never my skills.

The 3000 INR Allowance — While job-hunting in Bangalore, my mom sent me 3000 INR (~$50) a month. My classmates were making 35,000 INR (~$600) monthly at the same time.

Two Meals a Day — I ate only twice a day because I couldn't afford more during my job search. Mostly I was embarrassed by my rock-bottom situation and punished myself as a kind of judgement.

Under 10 INR a Day — I survived on less than 10 INR (~20 cents) a day in Bangalore for a year. That meant 4 INR for brunch and 5.5 INR for dinner at roadside shops.

The Weight of It

Psychological Toll — Being jobless humiliated me, and I blamed only myself and my own actions for the fiasco. I was my school's 10th-grade topper but became jobless in 2005 — the hurt was so deep I even consulted a psychologist, who was surprised when I said I had no suicidal thoughts.

Prayers Without Bread — My church group prayed for my job but never asked for my resume to forward. They didn't even ask whether I had eaten for the day.

The Death Prediction — A renowned Hindu astrologer (from my ex-girlfriend's family) predicted I would die in 3 years, convincing her to break up and marry someone else. I kept this secret for a long time because I didn't want anyone to panic or worry about me.

Judged by Relatives — Some relatives laughed at my situation and blamed "bad parenting" for my hardship. That kind of mindset is very typical in India.

Small Kindnesses

The Muslim Woman's Compassion — A Muslim woman at a Bangalore roadside shop understood my situation and offered me more food for less, sometimes free. She did this even knowing I had stopped believing in God and such theories.

The Grind

Teaching Myself Java — Too embarrassed to ask for help, and with friends busy and mostly from non-IT backgrounds, I taught myself Java. The internet was expensive and I couldn't ask my mom for extra money.

Robbed by Institutes — Most private institutes robbed money from candidates like me, treating us as easy victims and teaching nothing. I skipped them after losing 8k — a bigger loss than my 3k monthly allowance — and never told my mom.

Coding in My Head — When my PC broke for a month, I practiced Java in my notebook — handwritten programs compiled in my mind. I had no choice but to practice hard.

The Huawei Rejection — I reached the final interview at Huawei but was rejected for two reasons. I showed up 10 minutes late, and I had a Mechanical Engineering background.

The Climb

0–300 INR — I worked for 0–300 INR (~$5) for my first 9 months. It was the beginning of everything.

3–4k INR — I upgraded to 3–4k INR (~$50) at a startup. There I learned JavaScript, Ubuntu, and startup techniques.

13k INR at IIT-Madras — After a year of experience, I reached 13k INR (~$200) — my first manageable salary. Working alongside IIT students and researchers became my best learning-anvil.

What I Learned

15x the Effort — Many friends stopped learning after their Engineering degree. I put in 15 times the effort I gave in college and kept going at high speed — still learning rigorously today.

Never Stop — Never stop learning, and never give up your life for any reason. Here I am in 2026: I wrote my technical book, sold my startup, work as a consultant to feed it, and still dream big — I literally erased "give up" from my dictionary.